Monday, September 21, 2009

Fall, Fall, Fall

I can't believe it is official Fall - although we are/where having such summer like weather up until today - now it looks and feels like fall. I haven't been blogging lately as Im going through some private stuff and its hard not to just vent on here and well I don't think that would be the best thing for right now so I've been avoiding writing here but been keeping my own personal journal offline. God is so faithful and good let me just say that upfront.

Lets see - September marked the year anniversary of Preston's death. I have mentioned it before because I met P and his beautiful wife when I was at college and although we shared some classes God has used P's death to change my life. He broke my heart for P's wife and really made me realize how short life is. The Bible says we are just a vapour and even though I have known people who have died and its sad nothing has ever "rocked" me this hard as His death did. I remember the day, the place where I was when I heard the news so vividly. The thing I love about God is He makes no mistakes, His timing, His ways are so perfect. I never knew 6 years ago when I met Tara how God would use her in my life and place her in a spot in my heart that can't be replaced. I truly love this girl and she challenges me daily to be the best wife, daughter, Christian I can be - and sometimes I dont even think she knows she does. Thats just how amazing she really is. When I say she is beautiful I dont mean just outwardly either.

October also will mark the one year death of my grandma. I still can't been a year since both these two remarkable people have been gone. I love to think of how cool it would be for the two of them to be sitting at the banquet table just getting to know each other. Oh how heaven gained to heros and as much as Preston and my Grandma are so missed here on earth I wouldn't wish them back.

As much as Im a hot weather kind of girl I enjoy the change of seasons. I have been feeling "blue" lately so last week I decided one morning to go for a drive just me and Jesus. I popped in the new Selah cd (which may I add is fantastic) and I just drove out in the country and although some trees are still green alot have started to change colour and oh how beautiful they are. I had tears in my eyes as I listened to the music and drove. Tears of joy for how faithful and good God is, how beautiful His creation is, how lucky I am to live in such a free land and yet their are people still giving their lives so that I can live freely in this land, tears of sadness for two lives lost just a year ago, tears for my dear friend who is now a widow and raising two precious boys with out a daddy, tears because lets face it sometimes us girls just need a good cry.

I love October (I know its not October yet) because of Thanksgiving. I am so thankful for so many things in my life and so many people and I find at Thanksgiving (October) it forces me to really stop and be thankful and appreciate all I do have. I wish I was better at doing that throughout the year but I am working on it. This year I am especially thankful because we will finally take ownership of our very own FIRST house and that is definitely something to be thankful for. So Im going to try really hard for the month of October to post daily something/someone Im thankful for and why.

For those of you (and you know who you are) that are praying for me... keep praying!! God listens and hears every prayer and He does answer... even if you wait 6 years to see the full blessing of why he brings someone into your life like he did for me and T, or if you have to wait a few weeks to get an answer He is faithful.

So I guess I wanna know what is your favorite thing/part of Fall?


  1. I love everything about fall - the beautiful leaves changing, pumpkins, apple cidar, candles, baking bread. Everything - this is my favorite time of year. There is just a special feeling in the air when it's fall - it's hard to describe, but it's the best thing!

  2. You are absolutely precious and just wanted you to know that today!!! :)